Date: Tue, 2 Feb 1999 20:12:09 EST
34 Ways to Annoy People

 2.   Sit in your yard pointing a hairdryer at passing cars to see if
       they slow down.

 4.   If you have a glass eye, tap on it with your pen while talking
       to others.

 5    Sing along at the Opera.

 6.   Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all
      weather conditions "to keep them tuned up".

 8.   Practice making fax and modem noises.

11.  Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with
       prophecy".

12.  Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over
      your  ears.

17.  Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking
        noise.

25.  Try playing the William Tell Overture (The Lone Ranger Theme) by
      tapping on the bottom of your chin.  When nearly done, announce,
      "No, wait, I messed it up" and repeat.

30.  Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

31.  Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble the
         answers in a notebook.  Mutter something about "psychological
         profiles".