Julie Brennan (about Zoe Brown): "Zoe is evil. She went into my closet and stole the left shoe from each pair I own. Now I'm always half barefoot, and it's all Zoe's fault."

Zoe Brown (about John Severino): "When I met him, I thought John was a nice, normal guy, but, after he stole my credit card and used it to buy five large pizzas for the Lenny Kravitz fan club, I changed my mind. Sometimes, when he thinks I'm not listening, I hear him talking to himself. It's mostly normal ramblings, except for that time when we found him huddled up in a corner muttering, 'If I grow a handlebar mustache, the communists will leave me alone.' That was a little strange. Besides, John, you'd look much better with a Fu Manchu."

Jenny Conner (about Mike Conner): "I've been working with Whim for four semesters now, and never have I met a bigger slacker than Mike Conner. Don't let the name fool you: we are not related. Mike doesn't actually do any work for student media; he just hangs out in the lab throwing spaghetti on the ceiling and eating spice drops. What a tool."

Mike Conner (about Jenny Conner): "I was cool with Jenny until I walked by the Whim office and heard Barry Manilow. The music caught my interest, so I thought I would take a stroll by and see what all the commotion was about. Then, to my surprise, I saw Jenny making out with the Student Media Man cardboard cutout. I saw some tongue action, and ... perhaps some groping?"

Adam Frazier (about Katey Leiter): "I've known Katey for two years, and those two years have been the best of my college career. Why, you ask? Well, obviously it's because of the good times I've had with her--and by good times, I mean making fun of her. If it weren't for her, I don't know what I'd do. She is the shining light in the otherwise dark and lonely world that is Radford University. As we graduate and go on to bigger and better things, I will miss her clumsiness and ability to fall down stairs and sprain not one but both ankles. [This is the part where I make a comment about Katey's mom, but for this last edition of Whim, I will spare her the torment]."

Patrick Hunter-Kilmer (about Christian Keesee): "I've been sitting here for five solid minutes trying to find something nice to say about Christian. I guess I'll talk about his girlfriend instead. She's nice, and I bet she doesn't ritually abuse grammar rules like Christian does every week in his toons. Really, dude. I'm sitting in the student media lab EVERY DAMN WEEK. Is it so much to ask that you ask the resident anally retentive grammarian how to use a bloody comma? Love, your favorite liberal gay hippie."

Christian Keesee (about Grant MacHamer): "Grant is the kind of guy who makes me feel uncomfortable during production. I get the distinct feeling that he longs to sit on my lap. This could all be in my head, but I can feel his eyeballs all over my body. Although, I never said this was a bad thing. Grant is a cool guy. By cool, I mean creepy as hell. By creepy as hell I mean, I wouldn't want him any other way."

Katey Leiter (about Andrew Lent): "Ahh... Andrew Lent. Between his outrageous hair and horrid obsession with people's mothers, he really takes the prize for #1 tool. I do, however, enjoy his karate kicks and quirky 'Suz Leiter' jokes. Not that I will miss them ... at all."

Andrew Lent (about Julie Brennan): "So what do I want to say about Julie Brennan? Unfortunately, I have known Julie for over a year now, which by all accounts, is too long, because two hours is where it is at. She is from Massachusetts and wears flip flops all the time, and then complains that she is cold. She is also responsible for that heretical Pope of the Week abomination. Man, I would like to drop her off the second story balcony of Heth Hall!"

Grant MacHamer (about Patrick Hunter-Kilmer): "Some say it would take a novel to explain Patrick Hunter Kilmer, I'd argue that it's more like a multi-volume encyclopedia. Patrick is a man of great power within the Whim infrastructure; don't ask questions, he just is, and a master copy editor at that. Nay he's the master copy editor of the universe, plus infinity times two. He is in fact so good at copy editing that even if I were an illiterate quadriplegic, he'd still make me sound like a Rhodes scholar, it's baffling. Though, since Patrick will be copy editing this document, who's to say he didn't write this himself and have me (the real Grant) gagged and tied up in a closet? I suppose we'll never know, but all kidding aside, Patrick truly is a joy to have around and teaches me something new every day. Well at least every Thursday, and I suppose it's usually about copy editing, but it's important none the less. So Cheers Patrick and th'is; wonze-fohr, you' buddiey"!,"

John Severino (about Adam Frazier): "Adam, next to Mike, is the coolest guy at Whim. I don't think I've ever met anyone who has more of a creepy obsession with the band Less Than Jake than Adam. I mean, what's the deal with that? Like, even the band's name. How can you be 'Less Than Jake'? Sometimes I'll be working on my section, I'll look over, and he'll be staring at me. Kinda freaks me out, as well. Adam's cool, though. He grew up in Giles County, so I don't blame him for his crazy behavior. Oh! He's trying to grow a 'molester' mustache now, too; he says it's for some event in the summer, but I think it's because he likes little kids. No, Adam's cool. Congratulations on graduating."