Whim's April Fool's Edition

Holy crap! Itās April and Iām turning into a woman· or maybe not! Did I get your attention? I hope so, because this edition of Whim is quite a special one. It is chock full of articles and stories that are 100 percent pure certified Black Angus. Or maybe that was Holstein? Iām not sure. What the hell do I know about cows, anyway? Iām from East Jahbib and there are no cows there.

Well anyway, I was sitting in my hot tub behind my mansion down the road a piece from the school· you know the one, it has the hot tub in the backyard. What was I talking about?

Oh yeah, sitting in the hot tub, and I happened to be writing the introduction to the magazine you are currently reading, and you wonāt believe what happened. I had the best introduction ever written. I mean, it was Pulitzer Prize winning material. I put it down for a moment while I took a sip from my cognac glass and took a drag off my Cuban cigar and when I turned back around, I noticed that there were these little ants stealing it.

These werenāt ordinary ants. They all had little hard hats on and they were meticulously folding my introduction into a paper airplane. I was so enthralled with their hard hats and incredible origami skills that I totally forgot about my introduction.

Minutes later they took a running start and flew away on the paper airplane made from my introduction that would have won a Pulitzer Prize.

To make a long story short, this is why you are reading this sub-par introduction instead. Hope you enjoyed the story and even if you didnāt, I know you will enjoy this week's edition of Whim!

Take care, and have an incredible April Foolās Day!

John J Cordiano
Executive Assistant

	Life Officials Dispersing University Wealth Radford's Red Light District Revisited Dirty Little Secrets A Day in the Life... Top Ten April Fool's Jokes That Will Land You on the Darwin Awards List
	Tech Microsoft Introduces Stable Intuitive O.S. Innovative Breakthroughs! The Wonders of D.E.A.T.H. Star Trek's HoloDeck Becomes Reality Web Composition Submitted For Your Approval Season 4: April Fools Edition Ask the Geek: Season 3, April Fools Edition
	Ritz Staffer's All-Time Favorite Movies Album Review: "The Deejay Showdown" Watch Out for "Pooter"!
	Vent America at Peace Rockstars and Iraq: A Deadly Combination World Turns into a Tom Clancy Novel What do you Think? (Fake Headline Edition)
	Sports Marching Through the Madness: Midwest Region (AF) Marching Through the Madness: West Region (AF) Marching Through the Madness: South Region (AF) Marching Through the Madness: East Region (AF) The NCAA Report - Cinderella Arrives The MLB Report: AL Preview God to Play for the Baltimore Orioles
	Toon The Shittiest Cartoon Ever Tales From The 13th Grade Sk@t3r Boi Bluz

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This is no April Fool's joke, folks. She really is that beautiful!

Deanna Vestal
Sophomore
Position: Copy Editor
Join Date: Spring 2003
Favorite Quote: "To love another person is to see the face of God" from Les Miserables

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