View Feedback | Send this Article | Published 3/21/03

Graphic By: Andrew Kinback

Here is a personal story that got me thinking about the word confidence. I had a female friend come to Radford to visit me recently. She is an old high school friend of mine; sweet, warm-hearted and gorgeous. Really, any sensible guy who would have the honor of dating her would treat her like a queen. However, she is recently getting over a near two-year relationship that ended in chaos and is trying to get back her life back on track. She is happily living the singlesä life; going out to bars, dancing, socializing, and every so often accepting a date or two from a guy she meets. When she visited me a few weeks ago she confided in me a story I have heard all too often. She admits she meets a lot of jerks and jealous ladies on her outings. She constantly asks where all the good guys are and why they do not ask her out. I thought on this a bit and didnät come up with an answer to this question until I talked with one of my friends here at RU after she had returned home. He mentioned that he really liked my high school friend (who attends another Virginia University), thought she was beautiful, and really looked forward to meeting her again. Since he is a really nice guy I asked him why he didnät ask her out. He said that he did not consider himself in the same league as her and that she would never go for a guy like him.

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What is this league? Is it like a baseball league or something? I have heard of this league issue with potential daters before, as I am sure you have. It seems some people think that because someone is considered beautiful, or has an exceptionally warm and caring soul, they are higher than themselves and therefore out of bounds in the relationship realm. This is bologna. I donät think there is a person on this planet worthy of being in a league of their own. Oh, you will meet some prissy Üdaddyäs girl� every so often who thinks she is the only thing in the world that matters, but no one wants that kind of girl or guy because yes, guys can be just as big a prick and are guilty too. This league only exists in oneäs mind and the only reason it exists is lack of confidence.

You need confidence in yourself if you are going to pursue a relationship with the opposite sex. No one wants a shut-in or someone who looks down on him or herself all the time. People want to have faith and security in their partner. Donät believe someone is out of your league. No one can put you down or lower you but yourself. You see that cute guy or girl youäve been looking at? You know the one. Over there. See them? You can be friendly with that person. They are not above you in any way, shape or form. With a little confidence you can go over and say hi. If they shoot you down or laugh at you then you know that person is not for you. It is better that you tried and found out that this person is scum rather than know you never had the guts to try.

Confidence is the word of the day, friends. You can go far with confidence. You can topple buildings and build mountains with confidence. You can be happy with confidence. So go out there and ask that crush out for a drink or a movie. I promise you, you will feel like a King or Queen. Hail to the King, baby!