Ten Small Things that are Wrong With the World
  Jeff Davis | Vent Section Manager

  1. Far Too Jones broke up. FTJ were a wonderful band from North Carolina that played some of the catchiest songs I’ve ever heard. They recorded two albums, “Picture Postcard Walls” and “Shame and Her Sister.” Too bad they never got big, because “Julianna” and “Middle of Me” are two of the best modern rock songs I’ve ever heard.
  2. “Cheap” and “great red wine” don’t seem to go together. The only good, dry, and affordable red wine I can find is Rosemount Estate’s shiraz. It comes out of Australia, and it’s got quite a body. And, no, I don’t like Robert Mondavi. Not one bit.
  3. Boy bands are still here. Yes, their descent into no-one-caresness is obvious, but the fact that it didn’t happen sooner makes me very concerned.
  4. People are still smoking. I mean, good lord people, how inane do you have to be?! Do you realize how much extra money you’d have if you quit now? Not to mention 10 or so more years of life…
  5. My afghan has a! hole in it. My grandmother made me this afghan about 15 years ago, and I’m surprised I haven’t brought it to school until now. So I unfolded it, and, lo and behold, there’s a hole the size of a baseball right in front of me. Grrrrrrr!
  6. Speaking of baseball, what about those salaries? Apparently someone thinks that a guy chewing on tobacco and sitting on a bench for three hours and getting paid $300,000 a year to do it is a good idea. It’s right up there with Dr. Dre complaining that Shawn Fanning’s Napster program was stealing “food outta my kids’ mouths.” Yeah, Dre, you’re struggling about as much as Kenneth Lay.
  7. Spyware. If I find the little twit who designed the crap that I cleaned off my hard drive, I’m going to shove his computer up his butt. Then he can know what it’s like to have his privacy invaded.
  8. Sun screen still isn’t cool enough. Of course not, what do I know? Crispy people are probably great with ketchup and bring plenty of ! income to oncologists across the world.
  9. People still spell “receive” incorrectly. Don’t ask me why this bugs me so much. I’ve no problem with the evolution of our language. That’s why we have words like “usedtacould” and phrases like “50 cent.”
  10. People would still rather watch the movie than read the book. If you’ve never read “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy, you don’t realize that the recent film should have been about an hour longer.

Comments:
There's no such thing as great cheap red wine... you're right

Name: Bryan
Year: Sophomore
Comments:
Mega-dittoes on number 3.

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