I suppose in an ideal world, I could wake up, turn on my computer, log into my server, and see nothing in my mailbox but letters from friends and loved-ones. Well, this sure as hell isn't an ideal world. The proof behind the pudding is the "sex mail" that floods my box on an hourly basis.

Receiving "sex mail" gives me one of those indescribable feelings (like licking a 32-cent stamp, or watching a cow give birth on the discovery channel). It is a given. I get mail from every smut-ridden location out there. "Sure," I'll bet you're wondering, "How did it get there in the first place?" In this article, I will attempt to identify the problem, provide solutions, and explain what the future is for "sex mail" and other assorted junk mail.

I use America Online for my business and correspondence. With America Online, each user is given a chance to tell the world a little something about them. In this "profile," there are opportunities to describe who you are, where you are from, what you like to do for fun, etc. Each user has the ability to search for other users with the same interests, jobs, hobbies, or other characteristics. When a user finds another user, he/she may contact that person, and connections are made.

Often, most users aren't satisfied with just searching for those who like the same crap they do. If a single 30-year-old man wants to talk dirty, he sure-as-hell isn't going to take the time to find a 30-year-old, single female. For the fastest results, he will search for any user claiming to be female. Here is where the fun ensues... Profiles are not legally binding contracts. A 50-year-old man can describe himself as a young schoolgirl if he feels like it. That causes a great deal of confusion. Since no one really knows who the hell anyone is, it seems that almost everyone sends an "instant message" ("IM") asking everyone what sex they are, and how old they are. These "IMs" are very irritating for those of us who are honest in our profiles.

My profile is very non-chalant. There is nothing even remotely "racy" on my profile. That doesn't stop me from getting shit from every single "get-rich-quick, lose-weight-now, free-sex, free-cable-TV" company out there. They search the directories for certain attributes. If they search for people in the state of Virginia, they'll find me. If they look for male, non-married, they'll find me. I can't win. I'm not about to take down my profile just because I am getting crap-mail from these chumps. What can I do?

America Online is just one of the hundreds of Internet Service Providers who fight junk E-mail on a daily basis. AOL president Steve Case attempts to assure his 11 million customers that junk-mail is on the downfall. Truth is, nothing can stop it. There are talks of legislation which would defeat bulk e-mail. The legislation calls for a monetary fine for each mail it sends out. This law, should it go into effect, will be as ineffective as the current law banning pre-marital sex in the state of Virginia. It's not happening any time soon, and I'll tell you why.

New programs are out now which can provide total anonymity to anyone wishing to send spam E-mail. Sending mail from bogus locations, with artificial IP/addresses, from fake Internet Service Providers is now possible. AOL thinks it has the ultimate solution for the prevention of junk mail- Simply enter in all the E-mail addresses of those you correspond with, and AOL will block out all your mail that is not from them. Well, shit. That helps me about as much as bathing in toothpaste. I am a student, and I never know when someone from back-in-the-day will find my address and write me. I am a businessman, and I never know who is going to want my business and write me. I cannot afford to block my mail. Neither can most people.

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